Four Weeks, One Day!

I told him last night! :)  My prediction was right...at first he looked like he was going to puke!  HAHA!  I had taken a picture of the test and had him look at it...he stuttered around and I could tell he was freaking out.  After it had registered with him, he got really excited.  This is what we have been trying to achieve since February and finally, almost June, we succeeded!  We had a long talk about how we were both scared but how we both really wanted this and how we are going to focus on us.  We need to have a secure and strong relationship so we can be good rolemodels for our future children... I know that won't be a problem.  This is just another committment that Lance and I chose to make to one another and so now we will be linked for the rest of our lives.

I still haven't told anyone else yet.  It's quite amusing though - I went to visit my sister and she randomly told me that she thinks we should get pregnant together.  She started going on and on about when Lance and I were going to start trying...I wanted so badly to tell her that I had two positive pregnancy tests in the last two days...but I'm nervous to!  I don't know why...but I just am!  I told Lance that I do not want his family to know until we are certain that everything will remain fine with it...they are the last people I want to know my business...especially if something goes wrong.  I hate thinking that way, but it's always a possibility.  Every one of my friends that have been pregnant had several miscarriages.  It's a very scary thought.

Like I said in the last post, I had a feeling that I was pregnant before I took the test.  My stomach has been doing some crazy stuff this past week...it's been constantly upset...I always feel like I'm on the verge of puking even though I haven't.  (Ugh, I've heard the horror stories and I'm not looking forward to the upcoming months.)  My chest has really been hurting, especially first thing in the morning.  SO...here marks the beginning of many more bad days and months to come.  But I know it will all be worth it! :)

Drum Roll Please....

SO....I took a test this morning and it came out POSITIVE!!!  Lance and I are going to have a baby!!! :)

There was a part of me that sort of knew before I took the test...I had drank a few glasses of wine last weekend and I was SO sick afterwards...I know that is what happens very early into your pregnancy.  So I was kind of thinking it was a possibility but I didn't want to just assume anything.  My cycle should have came yesterday and it didn't, so I just thought "what the heck...let's just take a test and see."  AND....here we are!!! :)  Lance has no idea yet....No one does!! I had to come to work and didn't see him so I am trying to think of the right time and place to tell him.  I hope he is excited.  I'm not sure exactly how I feel...I sort of mixed emotions.  This is what I have been wanting for a while...to be a mom....but I know that my entire life is going to change forever!  It will no longer be what I want & when I want it...my child will have to come first.  There's also all of those fears....what if something happens?  Do I want to have to go through a miscarriage...physically and emotionally I know how hard they can be on women.  I am sure these are all natural fears that all women think as soon as they find out they are pregnant... I just feel so great knowing that we have started a life together.  I just pray that everything is fine with he or she and we have a healthy baby come January 30th, 2012.  (My estimated due date according to the computer...)  I am only about four weeks pregnant right now so I will not tell too many people...SO much can happen in this first trimester that I don't want to have to explain to everyone if something happens. 

I hope my family is happy and supportive....Lance and I had a rough first year but I know that we are great together!  We have our flaws and we have our fair share of arguments and disagreements but we have just grown so much as a couple and I know that we will be great parents.  I hope everyone is happy for us...including his family, (even though I know they won't be....but wishful thinking.)

I can't wait to tell him!  I'm sure at first he will look like he's going to puke...HAHA but I know once the initial reaction passes he will be very excited to be a future father.  Wow.  CRAZY!!!!

Happy Mother's Day!!!

Another month has came and gone....I will not be celebrating Mother's Day this year.  I am genuinely ok with it though...I know that we are capable of having a baby together but it's just obvioulsy not the right time.  I look so forward to the day I have Lance's child growing inside of me...it's just a waiting game though until it happens.  You can't rush God's plan... but when it happens...I will be ecstatic!  I did spend today with the wonderful mother's in my life...my beautiful mother, my sister, my grandma, and my aunt's.  They all are great role models to me as both people and as mother's.  :)


We celebrated our one year anniversary together on the 24th of April - I can't believe a year has already came and went.  It's been a wild and crazy year...but I know all the hardships just made us stronger as a couple.  Not a doubt in my mind that one day Lance and I will celebrate our fifty year wedding anniversary.  He bought me a BEAUTIFUL anniversary band and he tied it on Macoy's collar to give it to me....(when Lance proposed, he tied it around Rocky's collar so it was adorable he incorporated Macoy this time.) I have three bands already on my actual wedding ring, so I will wear it on my right hand!  I'm in love with it!  It was hard giving up the topaz ring I was originally wearing on there...but Lance said it was time for an upgrade.  He bought me the topaz ring when we first started dating as a Christmas present and I swore I'd never stop wearing it...but Lance forced me to! We then went to the Melting Pot at the Plaza (AMAZING!!!)  It's a fondue restaurant and we had such a great time... it was four courses and although it was rather pricey...we plan on making it a tradition.  We were both pretty miserable when we left there!


Definitely haven't lost ten pounds yet (I know, I know!)  But I think I'm down five?  That's something.  We bought bicycles yesterday and went for a nice long bike ride... my chubby butt and legs weren't happy afterwards...and I am certain my butt cheeks are just one great big bruise from the rather tiny bike seat... HAHA! BUT....it felt great to be doing something active with Lance - especially something active outside!  I'm going to get my butt back in shape if it's the last thing I do.... whether it's pre or post baby (whichever comes first...) I will not be this curvy anymore. 


My mom has been in a great deal of pain lately and I hate seeing her that way.  It breaks my heart.  I don't understand why she has to hurt...I would do anything to give her just a week of pain-free days.... I'd do anything if she could get on the ground with her grandchildren, go for a walk with my dad, I'd do anything if she could get out of a chair without grimmacing.  She is such a strong woman though...she never complains.  She lives each life as the gift from God that it is... sure, she tells me that some mornings she wakes up crying because of everything....her and my Grandpa not being here....but she truly is an amazing person.  We are treating her to a getaway to the KC Marriott and two VIP tickets to the Princess Diana exhibit... for Mother's Day.  I know she will just LOVE it!  I worry about the walking time but hopefully she will suck up her pride and let my dad push her in a wheel chair so she can enjoy herself and not hurt.  She deserves a break!


So there's a quick recap on life... life is still amazing, still not preggo, my mom's still being so strong and such a fighter, still in love with our home, and even more so in love with Lance.  Can't complain!